Transformers

[Uncle Du 22]

If you drool all over it, it won't work!

One thing that I did think of, way after the fact, was that while the plot was cool...there really wasn't much substance. So that makes me wonder: how many movies are they going to try and milk this cow for? Because, really, I wanna know how many movies I'm going to be shelling out money for. :p

[Drake 53]

Well Megatron and Starscream escape and who knows how many of those humanoid Decepticons are hidden around the world...

Besides, they still haven't done anything with Unicron yet.

[Uncle Du 22]

Damn right! That's what I'm waiting for! Unicron baby!

And for the record

I did predict that Prime would die when the very first trailer came out. Though, I was kinda hoping that it would be something towards the end of the movie, to lead into the next.

[Chickenman 9]

Transformers 2 was one of the worst movies I've ever seen, and I have (against my will) seen Just My Luck with Lindsay Lohan.

Were the special effects amazing? Not really. CGI has ceased to be interesting, and the smart directors have learned to only use it sparingly and not rely on it to carry the entire movie (Like in Jurassic Park, which may be one of the only movies to get CGI right). I don't understand people who are fascinated with the CGI of a movie. CGI looks fake. Every CGI movie I've ever seen has looked like Who Framed Roger Rabbit. You can tell the difference between real life and cartoon. And worse, it makes s***ty directors like Michael Bay think that you can still make a great movie without plot, acting or skill.

The plot (what little of it there was) sucked. Not that it mattered, because each story location was just another place to have robots destroy architecture, so it really didn't matter why the characters were there or what they were doing.

The humor...wasn't funny. Not once did I laugh at an intended joke. This is not to say that I didn't laugh throughout the movie. I did. Truth be told, it was one of the funniest movies I've ever seen, though it was all unintentional. I think I laughed hardest during Optimus Primes' death, which to be completely honest, was the only action scene in the movie that didn't entirely suck. I laughed my ass off that Michael Bay was filming like an 8 year old off his meds, where even simple dialogue scenes needed to have the camera swinging around like a carousel. Especially in Shia and Fox's "I'm not going to say I love you, YOU say I love you first!" scene. There's a lot more that I can't really remember, but I was laughing my ass off everytime something supposedly epic or awe-inspiring was taking place on the screen. The actual jokes of the movie made me want to punch the screenwriter's children. Each joke was just retarded, already done, or just juvenile. (And while juvenile humor can be funny, it certainly wasn't in this case.)

Of course, the women had no real part in the movie at all except for TnA, so that felt progressive. But it's no matter, because most of the characters in the movie were there for no reason, so at least Megan Fox has an excuse.

I think my favorite part of the entire movie were the minstrel show robots, Mudflap and Skids. Here we have two robots that look like monkeys, speak in jive, can't read, and one sports a gold tooth. And on top of being insulting racist caricatures of the like I haven't seen since the crows in Dumbo, except these are worse. I'm just glad we've made social progress since the ewoking 40s. There was absolutely no excuse for it. I'm not someone that gets too pissed off about things as long as they're done for humor, but this was damned mean-spirited and insulting. I understand that they were supposed to be some kind of comic relief, which is odd, because they were just annoying, and the only time I really felt elated when they were on screen is when one of them got eaten by the bigger robot (the one that, hilariously enough, later has testicles. COMIC GOLD! (It may not have been the same one, because in the grand scheme of things...it doesn't matter.)) but when he escaped, I literally screamed "NOOOOO!" at the screen, causing all of the people in the theater to look my way. I'm someone who hates embarassing myself in public, but I wanted Skids and Mudflap to die THAT BADLY. During one of their scenes, a black family behind me stood up and walked out. I hope they got their money back.

There's more I can say, but I won't, because this s***fest wasn't worth the time it took reviewing it.

[Uncle Du 22]

I'm still curious as to how people find those two imaginary, robot characters racist. People need to lighten the hell up when it comes to this, it's a damned movie for Christ's sake. It never ceases to amaze me that when a white actor, or director plays towards a black stereotype, they get eaten alive, but Spike Lee and others like him can crack jokes about crackers and whitey all they want and hear not a peep from ANYONE. Stereotypes exist cause there's always some out there to live up to them. And I for one am glad, because I think stereotype jokes are f-in hilarious, no matter who it's about, even me and my homegrown whiteness. People who are, in fact, comfortable with themselves, don't give a crap if they live up to a stereotype, cause they're happy with who they are. I have yet to hear anything from the people that those two characters are poking fun at, it's been from stodgy people of different colors who DON'T talk like that or act like that. When the hell did the American public get such thin skin and take everything so goddamned personally?

And speaking to the effects, well, they're space robots that transform. They look a helluva lot more real than the cartoon I used to watch, but yea, you can tell the craps fake. The movie did nothing to convince me that they're really hiding on our planet. The appeal to this movie is that it's a retelling of a childhood story that many people find endearing. I'll watch the next one, not cause I'm a mindless automaton, but because Transformers are f-in cool.

Edited July 3, 2009 by Du

[Drake 53]

I felt those two were more like Jar Jar Binks. They were just unnecessary. Those two could have been completely sane and still funny. Like Cheetor or Ratrap from the Beast Wars cartoon. They were comic relief while still remaining awesome.

My grievance with the movie, however, was the completely uncalled for sexual humour. I mean, the dogs humping...not once, but twice!? Did anyone find a point to that at all?

Regardless, I enjoyed the movie for the mindless robot violence. Also, the soundtrack. I am infinitely pleased that they kept the same music from the first movie, only changing it a small amount to make it different. I loved the soundtrack from the first.

Also, it's cool that they managed to get the female Terminator from T3. :p

[Andy 60]

I did find Mudflap and Skids to be rather pointlessly annoying. I can see how some people would find it racist too... however, if they made an obviously gay robot I wouldn't be offended. lol

Plus mindless robot violence is awesome. :D

[Uncle Du 22]

My grievance with the movie, however, was the completely uncalled for sexual humour. I mean, the dogs humping...not once, but twice!? Did anyone find a point to that at all?

Totally dude, that, I did not understand. Absolutely no point to it. All my friends with kids have said the same thing. I for one love it when my 5 year old son leans over and asks, "What are those dogs doin' Dad?" Awesome.

[Bad furday 57]

So in other words...Micheal Bay Jar Jar'ed?

No, I haven't seen it yet. I just want to see the scene where Sam's parents realise that their son's car is a giant robot. I think that if it wasn't micheal bay directing, and that both movies were done in a serious tone it could have been a really cool series of movies.

I think that film still of Megan and Shia on RC looks cool. Of course, I think it has something to do with the angle of the bike, and Megan Fox in leather pants

Bay...killing off RC..because he "always hated that character"

And...where's Grimlock?!

I guess I'd just like to see more sneaking around and stuff...think Oceans 11..or 12..but with robots in disguise, who don't want to be found out, and a few humans who know that the cars and other things are....more than meets the eye :p

Edited July 4, 2009 by Bad furday
Megan Fox's leather pants

[Drake 53]

I will now spoil you. Feel free to read them or not. I leave the temptation here for you to deal with.

No, I haven't seen it yet. I just want to see the scene where Sam's parents realise that their son's car is a giant robot. I think that if it wasn't micheal bay directing, and that both movies were done in a serious tone it could have been a really cool series of movies.

They already know at the start of the movie.

I think that film still of Megan and Shia on RC looks cool. Of course, I think it has something to do with the angle of the bike, and Megan Fox in leather pants

Bay...killing off RC..because he "always hated that character"

I don't recall seeing them on Arcee. Maybe a deleted scene? There are three Arcee models in the film and two of them get shot in the final battle. I don't know if that means they died but, if they did, there's still at least the one left.

And...where's Grimlock?!

Not in this movie.

I guess I'd just like to see more sneaking around and stuff...think Oceans 11..or 12..but with robots in disguise, who don't want to be found out, and a few humans who know that the cars and other things are....more than meets the eye

Prepare to be disappointed...

[Princess 35]

I saw it. I laughed. I cried. I loved it. I enjoyed the twins and Wheelie. I wish I would have seen it earlier so I could have caught it in IMAX

[Princess 35]

In regards to Chicken's post

Thats the one I find the most interesting. Since there argument implies there were no positive representations of African-Americans whatsoever which means they are totally ignoring Tyrese's roles as an experienced an honorable soldier. And considering that the only non totally buffoonish white character was Josh Duhamel , this movie seems to work with the premise that all white people are total complete morons or bat s*** crazy. Of course the rommate appeared to be Mexican so, should the Latino community be offended that the only Latino character is represented as a sex-crazed slacker full of cowardice. Funny how people, who complain about racism just flat out ignore the Mexican huh?

[Chickenman 9]

They. Looked. Like. Monkeys.

I think at that point, you've lost.

In regards to Chicken's post

Thats the one I find the most interesting. Since there argument implies there were no positive representations of African-Americans whatsoever which means they are totally ignoring Tyrese's roles as an experienced an honorable soldier.

The argument doesn't imply anything about there not being any positive representations. It simply states that there were some extremely negative representations. Just because one black character was a stereotype-free, honorable character, does not cancel out the fact that some other characters were portrayed like characters in a minstrel show.

"Do you know Jim?"

"Is he the guy that clubbed that hooker to death?"

"Now that's not fair. What about all the times he didn't club a hooker a death?"

And considering that the only non totally buffoonish white character was Josh Duhamel , this movie seems to work with the premise that all white people are total complete morons or bat s*** crazy.

But the thing is, all of these characters aren't morons because they're white. They're morons because they're crazy characters in a movie that tries and fails to be hi-larious. They just so happen to be played by white actors. They never once said white people are stupid.

Of course the rommate appeared to be Mexican so, should the Latino community be offended that the only Latino character is represented as a sex-crazed slacker full of cowardice. Funny how people, who complain about racism just flat out ignore the Mexican huh?

Again, he wasn't being portrayed with Latino stereotypes. Unless you're going to say that the character is sex-crazed because Latinos are sex-crazed. I would argue that the character is sex-crazed because he's a college student and computer geek. I'll also go on to say that the general stereotype of Latinos probably isn't slacker. My gardener can attest to that. Had the character danced around a sombrero while eating a taco, then I'd agree the character was a bit stereotypical.

I'm not being some bleeding heart apologist who's all for reverse racism here. I'm certainly not trying to be an ultra-pc douchebag that's trying to police what you can and can't joke about. In fact, I do jokes about race in my stand up, though I like to think that it's more of a comment on racial tension and turning stereotypes upside down. It takes a lot to truly offend me. I'm not all up in arms about this. I just think it's sad that this stuff, which truly did offend me on a certain level (though I was laughing my ass off at how obvious it was and how it helped make a truly abysmal movie even worse), is present in a popular mainstream movie of today. What the characters represented were some truly hurtful stereotypes that made an entire race look unintelligent. While I'm sure they were probably trying to comment on rap culture's encouragement of materialistic excess over education (though more than anything were just trying to be silly) I think they really missed their mark.

Edited July 30, 2009 by Chickenman

[Bad furday 57]

If there was, say, an auto-rickshaw parked outside a convenience store that transformed and sounded like an over exaggerated version of Apu, and followed every sentence with a Bollywood style dance, I think I would more thatn a little offended, and a bit embarassed to be in the theatre.

That said...after listening to the GeekShow podcast, I'm inclined to agree with this bit.

"I'd be more concerned with them being named Mudflap and Skids ( that's not short for skidmarks, is it?)

....really? Ewwwww "

[Princess 35]

They. Looked. Like. Monkeys.

I think at that point, you've lost.

Actually, I kind of thought that the green one (don't remember if he was Skids or Mudflap) looked like a robotic Yoda. At least in the face.

The argument doesn't imply anything about there not being any positive representations. It simply states that there were some extremely negative representations. Just because one black character was a stereotype-free, honorable character, does not cancel out the fact that some other characters were portrayed like characters in a minstrel show.

Do you realize how much this "minstrel show" representation has changed? Before it was portraying blacks with super dark faces, and red lips who could only say "yessuh" or "nossuh". Now it is Gold teeth and lisping (or in the case of the first one, break dancing rhyme masters). The only thing they have in common is that they can't read. Of course, if you paid attention to the movie, the language they were being asked to read was an ancient almost dead language meaning even Optimus Prime couldn't read those symbols most likely. SO the odds are they probably could read a modern language just not that ancient language. Not even Bumblebee could decipher the symbols for crying out loud (he was in that scene too remember?)

But the thing is, all of these characters aren't morons because they're white. They're morons because they're crazy characters in a movie that tries and fails to be hi-larious. They just so happen to be played by white actors. They never once said white people are stupid.

They never once said the Twins are stupid. Or that they were even black. They were first pink and white, than orange and green. And, so many white people make a living off of mincing similar mannerisms nowadays that it;s safe to say that these are simply character traits not necessarily associated with any particular race anymore.

I'll also go on to say that the general stereotype of Latinos probably isn't slacker. My gardener can attest to that.

Actually, that is one of them. But I will grant you that they didn't have him wearing a sombrero saying "Si senor" and "Ay yay yay yay!!!" And isn't having a Latino gardener a bit stereotypical?

I just think it's sad that this stuff, which truly did offend me on a certain level (though I was laughing my ass off at how obvious it was and how it helped make a truly abysmal movie even worse), is present in a popular mainstream movie of today.

So, they deeply offended you yet entertained you? I say entertained becuase you were laughing. I never really get deeply offended but I highly doubt a deeply offended person would laugh there ass off at something that deeply offended them. Not to mention that the main premise of this movie is Giant Alien Space Robots Fight other Giant Alien Space Robots on Earth. This isn't like Batman or Spiderman where they are trying to speak to something very real and emotional through larger than life character in extreme situations. It is about Nonsensical mayhem and nothing more. SO if anything, having such offensive character traits being displayed by equally nonsensical characters, in every sense of the term, really renders the significance of such traits as equally nonsensical. Just as how Eminem dressing and speaking "gangsta" renders the association of such traits with a specific race nonsensical.