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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 20, 2002 2:42 PM
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"You traitor!" gasped Darth Elderberries as he photosynthesised his last.
"Mon Mothma to see you" the comm buzzed.
"Ah good, give us a few minutes to clear up this mess and then I'll call for her." Chrysanthemum said.
Yoda, Yaddle, and Yado helped the Chief of State clear up the gardener and bush's remains.
"Hmm... A good bonfire this would make..." commented Yaddle.
A few minutes later they had finished stuffing the mess into the garbage chute and Crysanthemum signalled to let Mon Mothma into his office.
"Good to see you!" He said as the former Alliance leader walked in.
"What was it you wanted me for?" She said.
"I wanted to invite you to be one of my advisors" Chrysanthemum said.
"Well I was hoping to try out Uncle Vader's new health spa" she replied.
"Yes, take some time off, then come back when you are ready." He hesitated for a moment. "Could Masters Skywaklker and Katarn not make it?"
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 20, 2002 2:43 PM
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Mon Mothma shook her head.
"Master Skywalker is being taken back to Yavin 4 by his wife for what she said is 'extra training'."
"Need that the boy does." Yoda said.
"Kyle has gone for councelling," she continued, "I hear he accidently saw Master Skywalker naked".
"Oh," Chrysanthemum said, "Then I wish him a speedy recovery."
"I also understand that Han Solo is suffering from psychological trauma aswell" Mon Mothma added. "The specialists say he may never be the same again."
>DONE!
>(at last)
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 20, 2002 4:23 PM
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>Quick post...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 20, 2002 4:36 PM
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Luke, now clothed, was sat watching the holorecording.
"No! Stop! I can't take anymore of this torture! it's just too much!" he cried.
"It's just a redording of what you have been doing!" Mara yelled.
"I couldn't help it!" Luke wailed, "The bikini..."
"The bikini? Of course! it was all the bikini's fault, wasn't it!"
Artoo hid in a corner, worried that the soundwaves would damage his circuitry.
Mara noticed that they were almost at the Academy, so she moved into the cockpit to fly the ship down into the hangar.
* * * * *
A few minutes later they were working down a corridor, with Jedi Apprentices looking nervously at Luke.
"Kyle Katarn is in here," Mara said, stopping at a door, "I think you need to apologise to him."
"But isn't this a councelling room?" Luke asked.
"Yes." Mara said, pushing him in through the doorway.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 20, 2002 4:36 PM
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Kyle sat with his back to the door, and turned slowly round when he heard it open.
"Hello Kyle" Luke said.
"Argh! Get him away from me!" Kyle screamed in terror.
he dived over a desk and rolled over into a corner and hid behind a bookcase, with his activated lightsaber out defensively in front of him.
"See what you've done with all this nonsense?" Mara told her husband
"I did this to him?" Luke asked cautiously, "How?"
"Well put it this way:" said Mara, "I don't mind seeing you naked, but other people don't find the thought very appealing"
>DONE!
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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ROGUEeleven (Sticks)
Total Posts: 1304
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Date Posted: Oct 21, 2002 10:07 AM
This message was edited by ROGUEeleven (Sticks) on Oct 21, 2002 10:07 AM
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Luke blushed, and moved foward. "I'm so sorry Kyle. I didn't mean to--"
"Stay back!" Katarn said as he shrunk even farther behind the bookcase. "Don't come any closer! I'm--- I'm warning you!"
Luke stopped, and disgraced, he looked down at the floor. Mara put a hand on his shoulder, and led him from the room.
She then led him down to the mess hall. Many Jedi were there already, and those who were able tro resist the bikini's turned thier heads away from him in disgust. Others moved to the far reaches of the room, and others still sat motionless, in a state of shock. Luke stood in the doorway, looking from face to face, and then lokking down to the floor once again, as he walked off.
By now, tears streamed down his face. "I did all this?" he asked sadly, deeply upset with himself.
*~* XO *~* (actually contributing...lol)
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 4:10 AM
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>hehe
>Nobody going to post? I'll have to think of something...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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The Invisible Ana
Total Posts: 2735
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 5:03 AM
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>Luke's so sad... I can't think of anything to say!
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 7:30 AM
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>Posting<
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 7:38 AM
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On Alderann...
The Idiot's Array dropped out of hyperspace and the Punks were so releived. They wished that they hadn't let Padme Amidala and Wes ride backwith them. The two had been fighting the whole trip about Padme Amidala throwing out Wes' cloak.
"Finally!" Zekk exclaimed when they disembarked, "I thought those two would never shut up!"
"That is a fact," Tenel Ka replied.
The Punks caught the nearest taxi and went to Uncle Vader's Health Spa to unwind and plan another concert, this on on Coruscant, to celebrate the end of the horrors of the Bikini Republic.
Wes and Padme Amidala came down the ramp of the Array and people gasped in shock. Their long lost princess had returned. They hailed a cab and went to the palace, where there was a joyful reunion between Grandfather and Granddaughter.
>Done, and yeah it is a little cheesy but it's all i could think of<
*~~~~~Cadet 1~~~~~*
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Jaina Solo (Sticks)
Total Posts: 1486
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 2:01 PM
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< "You traitor!" gasped Darth Elderberries as he photosynthesised his last.ROTFL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Haha...that was great...> <Anyways, I'm gonna post!> ~*  *~ SF Lead ~* *~
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Jaina Solo (Sticks)
Total Posts: 1486
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 2:22 PM
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"Yes, you did all this, Luke," Mara said.
"These students will never be the same now."
"Oh," Luke whispered. "Well, who's up for some blended bikini?" he asked.
The looks on all the student?s faces were ones of pure disgust, and a few puked. "You're not helping matters," Mara groaned.
"No, I'm serious. There's a bottle of it right here!" Luke held up and flask that was labeled "BB, Blended Bikinis, in chocolate flavor!". He took a swig and grinned. "It's really good!" Everyone else groaned.
Luke took a swig and grinned. "It's really good!" Everyone else groaned.
Mara blinked in confusion. Hmm...Dejavu... she thought to herself.
TBC...
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Jaina Solo (Sticks)
Total Posts: 1486
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 2:34 PM
This message was edited by Jaina Solo (Sticks) on Oct 22, 2002 2:35 PM
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"Something doesn't smell right here," she said.
Luke sniffed his armpits and made a face. "Sorry bout that, I'll take a shower when I get to my quarters."
"No, not that, I meant something's not right here. What was up with that dejavu thing?" Mara asked.
A student stepped forward. "Hey, you're right, something weird is going on. That reoccurrence, or dejavu, can mean only one thing."
"That we're all really hungry and need some food?" another student asked.
"No," the first student, who Mara recognized as a Human girl named Trinity. "It means that we've entered into the Matrix."
"The what?"
"The Matrix: a detailed virtual reality created by a computer that has taken over the Galaxy of the future." Trinity explained.
"Oh, well who cares about this 'Matrix' thingy. I'm hungry," Luke said.
TBC...
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Jaina Solo (Sticks)
Total Posts: 1486
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 2:38 PM
This message was edited by Jaina Solo (Sticks) on Oct 22, 2002 2:40 PM
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Mara glared at Luke. "Sit down and listen to what she has to say, or you won?t get any supper tonight." Luke glanced up hungrily. "What are you making?" He asked eagerly. "Nothing. You're turn to cook." Trinity continued explaining about the Matrix, and when she was done Mara frowned. "So how do we stop this Matrix thingy from conflicting with our Galaxy?" she asked. No one said anything. <Done! You guys can play off this from here...> ~* *~ SF Lead ~* *~ edit: when I pasted from Word all the quotation marks and apostrophes were changed to question marks, so I changd them back :P
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 4:53 PM
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> *groans* > Ah well, shall we leave it for Pod to sort out?  -=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 9:14 PM
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>Late night + Evil idea = Confusion<
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 9:26 PM
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Padme Amidala and Wes had an extravagent wedding. Dignitaries from all over the galaxy were there. All of the Skywalker family was there. Somehow Mara and Luke managed to escape the thing called the Matrix to make it for the wedding.
Wes Janson had never looked so serious in his entire life. Wedge and the rest of Rogue Squadron thought that someone had given him a brain transplant.
For once, there was no galaxy-threatening event that interrupted a Skywalker family event. The wedding ceremony went off without a hitch, and then the best reception in the galaxy occurred.
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 9:37 PM
This message was edited by Princess2783 on Oct 22, 2002 9:38 PM
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C
The Punks did a concert for Padme Amidala's wedding. Everyone had a great time. The BE flowed like there was an endless supply of Ewoks flourishing on the Sanctuary Moon. Everyone got drunk quickly and stayed that way.
Padme Amidala decided that now was time to make the announcement that she'd been dying to make.
"Atten-shun everyone. I am o-o-overflowing with excitement to tell you this. I am telling you today that I am overthrowing Darth Chrysthanthemum and am d-d-declaring my-shelf the Supreme Ruler of the New Republic, henceforth called the Skywalker Republic. Thish family will rule the galaxy now and forever."
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 22, 2002 9:44 PM
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C
Jaws dropped. An erie silence filled the hall. Then somewhere in the back of the room someone started to clap. Then applause filled the room.
"That's my girl!" Vader yelled above the crowd.
"And I am having the Jedi Punks write a new anthem for the Skywalker Republic," Padme Amidala had to shout over the crowd.
The Punks made the roar even louder, no one could hear a thing anymore.
>Done, and sorry Beeurd for getting rid of Darth Plant-dude.<
*~~~~~Cadet 1~~~~~*
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 12:01 PM
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>Of course you know, this means war...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 12:08 PM
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"Wow, and I thought Anakin got drunk bad the other night" Zekk said.
"What? I've been out-drunked?" Anakin cried.
"Looks like it bro" Jacen said.
Padme Amidala was now dancing, or at least tryning to dance, on too of a table in the centre of the room.
"Um, Luke?" Mara said.
"I thought what you did was bad, she's going to regret this soooo much in the morning"
Leia sighed. "Why is my family so embarrassing?"
Han shrugged, "Well you know all that psychological trauma from having a Dark Lord of the Sith as the main fatherly figure..."
"Han," Leia said, "shut up."
>DONE for now...
>But I'll be back, and in greater numbers!
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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TheUnknown285
Total Posts: 293
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 1:01 PM
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<Does that mean Beeurd is returning with his alternates?>
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 2:46 PM
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>Nah, he's just mad at me for getting rid of his Sith Plant<
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 3:59 PM
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>heehee
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:15 PM
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>Post now I will<
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:23 PM
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The wedding reception lasted long into the night of the next day. Everyone finally started to leave.
"Come on Padme Amidala, let's get you to bed, you're more wasted than your brothers." Wes told his new wife.
"Ohh come on honey, letsh just party a wittle bit longer," Padme Amidala replied.
"Man Pad," Anakin told his sister, "I've never been outdrank like that before. We'll have to move you onto Orange Glo from BE, then we'll see who can outdrink who."
"Please," Amidala replied, "I just use the force so I appear more drunk than I am. It made people laugh about my plot to take over the galaxy, but I'm serious little brother. It's our right to rule the galaxy little brother."
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:36 PM
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C
"Now, let's go to Coruscant. I want to move into the Palace as soon as possible. It's my birthright." Padme Amidala told her family. "Besides, my SSD the Desert Rose should be here by now."
"You have a Super Star Destroyer?" Leia asked in shock. "How in the name of the Force did that heppen?"
"Oh I met Grandpa Vader a few years ago and he gave me a replica of the Executor for a Lifeday present. I've had it refurbished and it's my flagship now." Her comlink buzzed and she answered it. "OK guys, let's get the Array and Falcon onboard and get to Coruscant."
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:41 PM
This message was edited by Princess2783 on Oct 23, 2002 4:42 PM
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TBC
Everyone got settled into the Rose and were amazed at how nice she looked for an ex-Imperial ship.
The journey to Coruscant went without problems, Padme Amidala tested her siblings in the force and they were all amazed by her strength. All too soon they arrived at Coruscant though, by then everyone was very drunk.
"Darth Chrysanthemum, this is Padme Amidala Skywalker Organa Solo Kenobi Janson, and I am here to duel you for the Presidency of the Republic. A shuttle will be sent down to the Palace and will bring you to the Rose. We will duel here." Padme Amidala announced over the comm system.
"I accept your challenge young Skywalker, be prepared to lose." The answer came back from the planet.
TBC
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:43 PM
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>dear oh dear... >wait 'till you see MY evil plan -=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:49 PM
This message was edited by Princess2783 on Oct 23, 2002 4:49 PM
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Everyone headed down to the dueling arena built into the ship.
"Ok everyone, here's the plan..." Padme Amidala quickly whispered out the plan to everyone. She finished just in time.
Everyone felt the dark presence as Darth Chrysanthemum entered the arena.
Padme Amidala and Darth Chrysanthemum squared off in the middle of the arena. Padme Amidala opened herself to the force and felt the force-meld of everyone around her. The power was awesome.
Darth Chrysanthemum struck first. Padme Amidala sensed it coming and parried and struck off one of his branches. His cry of pain filled the room.
Padme Amidala got in another good strike, taking off another branch, then Darth Chrysanthemum recovered and almost connected with his lightsaber. Now everyone! Padme Amidala sent through the force meld.
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 4:58 PM
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Everyone jumped out of their hiding spaces and surrounded Darth Chrysanthemum. There was no way that the evil plant could ward off that many attacks. As he turned to defend from one attack, another Jedi would attack, cutting off another piece of Darth Chrysanthemum. Soon there was none of the plant left.
"Long Live Padme Amidala!" Everyone chanted as the last pieces of the plant fell to the ground.
Padme Amidala gathered the pieces of the Sith plant up and started a small fire, then she handed everyone marshmallows on a stick.
"What are these?" Tahiri asked.
"They're called marshmallows, if you hold them over the fire and let them get brown they're really good."
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 5:06 PM
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C
"MMMPPPPPPPHHHHHH!!!!!" Anakin yelled. His mouth was wide open and you could see the still-flaminig marshmallow in his mouth.
"Anakin you idiot!" Jaina yelled at him. "Don't you know to blow out flaming things before you put them in your mouth. Just use the force you moron."
Padme Amidala excused herself and walked over to the nearest holocom. "Attention everyone, this is Padme Amidala Skywalker Organa Solo Kenobi Janson. Earlier today, Chief of State Chrysanthemum died of natural causes. I am now Chief of State of the Skywalker Republic. Long live the Skywalker Republic! May the force be with y'all."
>Done, and yes Pod, you know what that marshmallow reference is about.<
*~~~~~Cadet 1~~~~~*
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 5:10 PM
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>Now I post. Even if it is 1:12 am
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 5:10 PM
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>Have fun beeurd<
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 5:28 PM
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Yoda yobbled across his apartment room.
"Disturbing this is," he said to Yaddle, "a Jedi acts not like this Padme Amidala."
Yaddle and Yaddo nodded in agreement.
"I sense grave danger in her ruling the Republic." Yoda continued, "And more to Chief of State Chrysanthemum's death there is, than has been revealed, I feel."
"Meditate we should," Yaddle suggested, "then solve this mystery we might."
The three small green Jedi sat crosslegged in the centre of the apartment and began to meditate.
* * * * *
Meanwhile at the Skywalker Palace's main docking bay, a shuttle landed, carrying Chief of State Padme Amidala Skywalker Organa Solo Kenobi Janson, and her bodygaurd.
"Now I control the Republic, I know longer need this disguise!" she cackled.
Leia looked at her strangely, and before her eyes, Padme Amidala, unzipped her disguise and revealed herself to be Jabba the Hutt!
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 5:41 PM
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"Jabba?" Leia gasped.
"Emperor's Black Bones!" Han exclaimed. "You still after that money?"
"Hey I thought I killed you!" Leia blurted.
"Oh, that!" Jabba said, "This is just a disguise in case I needed a new disguise!"
"Eh?" Han said, putting his wallet away.
Just then Yoda, Yaddle, and Yaddo arrived with Luke and the Punks.
"Whoah, what happened to you?" Jaina asked the disguised person.
"Oh it's just a disguise I could use to infiltrate the Republic and take it over and use it for my own evil plans" The person in the disguise said.
"Know who you are, we do!" Yoda said speaking for all the Jedi. "Meditated we did, and discovered your secret"
"Oh no, I am so scared."
The guards pulled off their helmets, and were revealed to be Gungans.
"Oh, please no!" Leia and Han cried, as the disguised figure tore away a voice modifier and the last peices of costume.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 6:06 PM
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"Hellooo, mesa said I would be back!" said Jar Jar, having ripped away all the disguises.
"As we feared, it is" Yaddle said sadly.
"Mesa tired of yousa silly voices" Jar Jar said. "In the Jar Jar Empire yousa now are!"
Jar Jar marched the whole lot up to his office.
* * * * *
"Welcome to Otah Jar Jar" a message said on the navicomp.
"That's odd," Kyle Katarn said, "I could have sworn it was called Coruscant the other day..."
"I wonder what's going on." Jan said, beginning to pull some info off the holonet.
"Hmm Jar Jar is back, and has taken over the Republic...
"What? I only just recovered, and now I have to put up with this?" Kyle moaned.
>DONE!
>Ah, sweet revenge...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 8:07 PM
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>Now it's my turn for revenge<
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 23, 2002 8:14 PM
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"MMMPHH!!!" A noise came from the closet in Jar-Jar's office. It was followed by a loud thud.
"What was that?" Zekk asked.
"Paysa no attention to the person in the closet."
Wes, still feeling sick from thinking he married Jar-Jar, was the closest person to the closet and he opened the door. Hanging on a hanger in the closet was Padme Amidala. Wes ripped the duct tape off of her mouth and curses filled the air.
When Padme Amidala was done cursing out Jar-Jar she explained what happened. "It was at the wedding. I went to go to the refresher and I got jumped by a band of Gungans. Luckily it was after I had made my announcement. Jar-Jar had me tied up and brought here, so that he could take over the Skywalker Republic."
Jar-Jar was cowering in fear behind the desk. "Jar-Jar Binks," Padme, Vader's wife said. "You are under arrest for the abduction of the Chief of State, prepare to die."
>Done, sorry Beeurd, couldn't let you do that<
*~~~~~Cadet 1~~~~~*
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 7:56 AM
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>Oh really? I'm posting now...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:09 AM
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"What?" Zekk said, "So it was Jar Jar that led us to kill Chief of State Chrysanthemum?"
"Fooled, you were" Yoda said sadly, "A good plant he was, have a proper memorial service we should"
"Hey, where's Jar Jar?" Leia said.
Han gasped and pointed out the window.
A huge flying robot bristling with guns hovered outside, and launched twenty missiles towards the Palace.
Everybody ran for cover, and were all safely in the main hall a few minuted later.
"Terrible this is" Yaddle commented.
Kyle Katarn and Jan Ors ran into the hall.
Luke quickly apologised again to Kyle and gave him an update.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:11 AM
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>Actually I think it's okay now that your character didn't kill mine...
>I'm Still posting, btw.
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:19 AM
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Several large explosions made the Imperial Palace shudder and peices of the ceiling began to collapse.
"Get out of here we should" Yoda said, and they all headed towards the door.
"It's jammed shut!" Anakin cried, "I'll never be able to get drunk again!"
"Anakin, look!" Tahiri shouted
"What? Another way out?" He said looking over.
"No, an abandoned bar!" She jumped with joy, "Coming?"
"Yeah!" all the Punks said together and ran to loot the cantina.
Suddenly a huge explosion rocked the whole building, and Jar Jar's huge robotic suit ploughed down through the roof and landed in the center of the room.
"Where are the kids?" Leia said.
"They went over to that Cantina." Han said, pointing over the other side of the hall.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:32 AM
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"Yousa all gonna be deaded nowsa!" Jar Jar's evil voice boomed out from a speaker.
"Run!" Han yelled, andd they all ran and found a crack in the wall large enough for them all to squeeze through and hide in.
"Where yousa go?" Jar Jar moaned. "Wesa were havin' funsa... Well mesa was."
Inside the hole the others whispered to eachother.
"There's not enough of us to take on Jar Jar" Mara said.
"Still people loyal to the Bikini Republic there are" Yoda said.
"Hey, I could convince them to come here and save us!" Luke said.
"Whoah," Kyle said, "please don't get changed into a bikini"
"I won't" Luke said, "I'll just send a voice transmission"
Luke reached for his comlink and told the last remaining army of the Bikini Republic to attack Jar Jar.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:40 AM
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A few minutes later, hundreds of Bikini Troopers burst in through the door and started firing at Jar Jar.
Everyone looked away in disgust.
They heard the blasts going off and Jar Jar's personal turbolaser and missile launchers firing everywhere.
About half an hour later the fighting stopped.
"Hey we did it!" Luke shouted then poked his head out the hole.
"Yousa haveta do betta dan dat!" Jar Jar cackled.
"What happened?" Luke said to Yoda, as they looked out over the hundreds of bikini-clad corpses littering the hall.
"As I expected this is" Yoda said happily. "Now no more remains of the Bikini Republic"
"Well I suppose that is good, but we are still stuck here" said Luke.
"Opened the door is, run we must!" Yoda said.
"We should go and get all the Jedi to help battle Jar Jar" said Luke.
"Good plan you have, for once" Yaddle told Luke.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 8:58 AM
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"Where are yous runnin' to?" Jar Jar yelled angrily as he saw his targets running through the main doors.
* * * * *
"Hey, I think this is the last barrel of Lomin Ale!" Valin shouted.
"Yeah, lets get this all back to the ship" Jacen said.
The Punks levitated all the booze and headed back to the Idiot's Array for a party.
* * * * *
"Go and gather the Jedi we will" Yoda said, as he, Yaddle, Yaddo, Luke and Mara walked away to Yoda's Star Destroyer, now renamed from the Green Bikini to the Green Side of the Force.
"And we'll go and get Wedge and Rogue Squadron" Wes said, as he and Padme Amidala walked away.
"I think I'll go to Alderaan and see if I can get my husband to help" the original Padme said.
Han and Leia now stood there alone.
"Hey we finally got some time to ourselves" Han commented.
"Yeah we did!" Leia said. "So what do you want to do?"
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 9:07 AM
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"Heeelloooo!" Jar Jar said "Mesa seein' yousa!"
"Can't we get a bit of peace?" Han yelled at the approching evil.
"Okay, yousa gettin some time alone" Jar Jar said and his robots head hung unhappily and he walked away sulking.
"Phew!" Leia said.
"We'd better find the kids" Han said.
They headed off to the Falcon and could hear Jar Jar trashing the city in the distance.
* * * * *
The Punks had just got the booze back to the ship when the Millennium Falcon landed next to them.
>DONE!
>I've just about run out of ideas for now, but you can see I'm setting it up for a mega battle against Jar Jar.
>Okay Princess, shall we call off our war for a while? At least until we have had an amazing battle against Jar Jar...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 12:14 PM
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>You win for now beeurd, you can have your big battle, but I'm going to do something with Mara now<
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 12:21 PM
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Mara and Luke had got back to Yavin 4 just in the nick of time. No one had seemed to notice that Mara was now VERY pregnant. She felt a slight twinge in her abdomen area and realized that this baby wanted out now!
"Farmboy, it's time for us to have a baby," Mara told Luke. Luke did a dance that Wes would have classified as Wedge's Ewok dance of joy, it was scary. "Hey Farmboy, I mean NOW!"
"OK OK, sheesh you think we were having a baby or something."
"We are having a baby Farmboy."
Luke got Mara into the temple and up to the medical unit and went and called Cighal, then returned to Mara's side, right as the first hard contraction hit.
"FARMBOY YOU ARE NEVER TOUCHING ME AGAIN!!!!" Mara screamed in the agony of the contraction.
TBC
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 12:26 PM
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Many hours later...
Luke had heard curses coming from his wife that he had never heard before, not that any of them suprised him. Finally Mara gave a final push and their son was born.
"Ohhh he's so pwecious yes he is," Luke crooned to the baby.
"Can it Farmboy and let me see our son," Mara told her husband. Luke put the baby boy into her arms and then Mara dissolved into a sea of baby talk.
"What should we name him, Mara?" Luke asked quietly.
"You name him, Luke."
"Ben. Ben Skywalker."
Ben looked up into Luke's eyes, and Luke thought there was something odd about this child. There was a certaing look in his eyes and there was a strange unease in the Force.
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Princess2783
Total Posts: 159
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 12:28 PM
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The attack came suddenly and without warning. A frying pan came flying through the air and hit Luke over the head with a frying pan. "Not the Mama!" Baby Ben cried out, before dissolving into a fit of giggles.
Mara burst out laughing.
There was definately something special about Ben.
>Done<
*~~~~~Cadet 1~~~~~~*
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 12:57 PM
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>I'll post now.
don't look so shocked!!<
~_~_Stead 1_~_~
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:02 PM
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>* jaw drops open and eyes pop out *
>I'm so shocked!
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:02 PM
This message was edited by JainaSolo;)* on Oct 24, 2002 1:09 PM
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The punks were at some distant point in the galaxy, yet to be named. They had messed up the coordinates they were putting in the hyperdrive of the Fizz Hound, their ship. >I think...<
"Weird. We wanted to go to Yavin 4 and instead we end up in a swamp."
"Not a mudhole! My home, this is!" the punks head an all-too familiar voice cry. They turned to see Yoda arguing with a very young Luke.
"Um, guys? I have a feeling we're not on Coruscant any more." Jaina muttered. In a puff of pink smoke, a girl with long brown hair and hazel eyes materialized in front of the bewildered punks.
"Hello! I am Glinda, the Good--uh, I mean, Christiene the Info Girl!" she said cheerily.
"What happened to Bob?"
TBC
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:06 PM
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C
"Who's Bob?" Christiene asked.
"She doesn't know Bob?" Anakin gasped.
"We're doomed." Jacen stated.
"Bob's the Info Guy."
"Oh, him? He's about thirty years into the future! Why are you looking for him?"
"Woah, wait, hold the horse, back up. Future?"
"Yes, future."
"Uh-oh." Tahiri said. "Okay, we're from the future then! Bob's there to make sure we don't kill ourselves!"
"Ah, well, then i'll have to help you for now I suppose."
"Probably."
"You need to know how to get back to the future?"
"Yes"
"That's a problem, then. I don't know."
The punks were astonished. "But you're the Info Girl!"
Chrissy could only shrug helplessly.
~_~_Sf1_~_~
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:07 PM
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>ha, ha, Beeurd.
I could claim war, but I won't, because I've got homework...<
~_~_Sf 1_~_~
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:11 PM
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>Confusion! My specialist subject!
>I'm posting now!
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:19 PM
This message was edited by Emperor Veydar Beeurd on Oct 24, 2002 1:23 PM
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>Oh yeah, and the Punk's ship is the Idiot's Array at the moment.
* * * * *
Chewie growled something.
"Hey Chewie where you been?" Han said running up to his loyal friend.
[You kept leaving me behind!] Chewbacca said.
"Oh yeah, we did, didn't we..." said Han.
Leia pointed over to where the Punks were: "They're gone!" She said, "They just disappeared!"
"Ah well, they can't help fight Jar Jar then" Han said and walked back up the Falcon's ramp.
* * * * *
"Well at least we got the beer!" Anakin said cheerfully.
The Punks all gasped as the barrels dissappeared.
Zekk threw down a bottle of Windex. "I really gotta stop drinking this stuff.
TBC...
>[EDIT=spelling mistake]<
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 1:36 PM
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"What's going on?" Anakin wailed and ran in to check the ships computer.
The screen was blank.
As he looked at it as green letters typed themselves out.
WAKE UP ANI
"Eh?" Anakin said to himself.
THE MATRIX HAS YOU
"Whatever..." Anakin muttered and turned around to walk out.
A little kid sat on the floor behind him bending spoons with his mind.
"What are you doing to our cutlery?" Anakin demanded.
"You must try to realise the truth" the boy said.
"What are you on about?" said Anakin, he was getting confused hich could mean only one thing - he was sobering up!
"There is no spoon" the kid said.
Anakin grabbed an unbent spoon and poked the kid in the eye with it. "Are you still sure there is no spoon?"
"Argh!" The boy yelled in pain.
>DONE!
>Okay so I decided to make the Punks lost in the Matrix, so what you gonna do? lol.
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 3:03 PM
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>lol!! I've really, really got to do homework...<
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 24, 2002 3:55 PM
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>No don't do it Jaina! >Don't go sane on us -=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 12:44 PM
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>How could you let this thread get down to pg2? You Psycho's should be ashamed of yourselves!
>By the way, I'm posting!
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 1:07 PM
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Anakin walked back out to the others, but he found them all in a circle in comfortable chairs.
A powerfully-built dark-skinned man stood in the middle of the circle and gestured to the last remaining seat.
"I am Morpheus" the man said, "and I am here to offer you the chance of freedom"
"Freedom from what?" Asked Zekk.
"This world you see around you, is not real" Morpheus told them, "It is merely an illusion, by the machines - called the Matrix"
"What kind of machines?" asked Anakin.
"Uh, big scary ones." answered Morpheus.
"Scarier than Frankendroid, from that holomovie?" Valin asked.
"Oh, yes, Frankendroid is a household appliance compared to these machines" Morpheus said.
Jysella gasped.
"I'm going to offor you the choice to get free of this false world and return to the real world" said Morpheus.
TBC...
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Sith Apprintice Me,Me
Total Posts: 257
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 1:37 PM
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Do i need to read this whole thing before i start commenting on it?
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 1:47 PM
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The Punks watched as a little pocket opened in their seats, revealing two small coloured pills.
Morpheus continued: "You take the blue pill and you will forget about the Matrix, take the red pill and you will be freed from it!"
The Punks all reached for the red pills and swallowed them.
* * * * *
Back on the Falcon, Han, Leia and Chewie were just getting ready to take off.
Chewie growled something. [I'm telling you, I saw them take off!]
"Ah well, that's a shame," Han said, "but the Jedi and the Rogues will almost be assembled now, and we have to go kill Jar Jar"
"Grouuugar?" asked Chewie.
"Yeah, again." Han sighed.
* * * * *
Anakin woke up in a gold-coloured fluid, and tasted a gulp of it. Hey this is cider! he thought, and started drinking it all, when he realised he was naked, and had a socket in the back of his head.
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 2:02 PM
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He tried to turn around to see what it was and it detatched, and he saw and Astromech droid retracting it's datalink.
"What's happening?" Anakin moaned. He looked around and saw the other Punks also extremely embarressed.
A loudspeaker came on and said "You are now free from the Matrix, and free from the horrors of Alcohol"
All the Punks yelled together: "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:00 PM
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Anakin woke up first, and looked around groggily.
"Uhh..." he moaned.
Jecan was slumped over an empty barrel of
"Jace, wake up" he whispered.
"I don't go to school anymore..." Jacen mumbled before waking up fully.
They stumbled over into the cockpit and found Jaina talking to Lowie.
"Well, next time, don't drink and fly!" Jaina said, holding her painful head.
"Where are we?" asked Jacen.
"Lowie here crashed into what was left of the Imperial Palace." Jaina said angrily, "How he managed to crash into the shortest building on the planet I'll never understand"
They heard ships flying overhead, and a familiar voice over a loudspeaker: "Mesa no wantin' to be killedsa! Yousa gonna be dyin'!" Jar Jar said.
"What's going on outside?" Valin said, as he crawled into the cockpit and threw up.
"I dunno." said Jaina.
* * * * *
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:03 PM
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>Do i need to read this whole thing before i start commenting on it?
Well you could, but it would take ages, so you could comment on what you have read...<
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:21 PM
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Rogue Squadron flew overheard, making attack runs in pairs at Jar Jar's giant robotic suit.
The Jedi, being lead by Yoda and Yaddle, while Luke and Mara where looking after their baby, headed along the ground to attack Jar Jar's legs.
Vader decided not to come and help, so Padme had just stayed with him at his health spa on Alderaan.
The battle raged on for many hours, and nobody seemd to gain any advantage over the opponent.
Then John wandered up from the wreckage of the Idiot's Array and noticed Jar Jar battling it out with the Jedi and Rogue Squadron. He walked up to the back of the right leg and flicked a red switch.
"Whassa happenin'?" Jar Jar cried as all the power went off. "Mesa gonna die in here!"
TBC...
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:24 PM
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Jar Jar fell out and landed on the floor where all the Jedi quickly slashed at him with their lightsabers.
Soon, all that was left of Jar Jar was a puddle of orange goo.
"Anyone want some Blended Jar Jar, do they?" Yoda asked, then burst out in to a fit of laughter.
Nobody else laughed.
Suddenly, Leia, Han, and Chewie raced round the corner.
"Where is he?" Han yelled "I'll kill him!"
The Jedi all pointed to the puddle of goo.
"Oh, I see." Han said, "Well if you don't want my help you shouldn't have asked for it"
The rest of the Punks came slowly out of the Imperial Palace's ruins, clutching their hungover heads in pain.
"Anything interesting happened here"? asked Tahiri.
>DONE!
>Yes, I finally finished, I only took a couple of hours...
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:41 PM
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>sorry, beeurd, but I went sane for a while after I failed that test.....and went and ranted insanely about it on GB......so doing my homework would be a good thing....
BTW, I'm posting.
It would help if my parents had let me see the Matrix...<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:48 PM
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Back in that alternate reality on Dagobah, the Punks were speaking with Christine the Info girl about getting to their won galaxy.
"So we cant go back.....why?" Jaina asked for the hundereth time.
"You've switched realities with your other selves. Which, technically, weren't born yet, so you should being to fade out of existance any time now...."
"what?!" Anakin exclaimed. He was watching Jysilla's arm disapear with horror etched upon his every feature.
"Yes-sir-ree-bob, you should go away anny time now." Christiene said. "Then I can finish my book about the Chipawa indians."
"Someone help me!!" John screamed as his legs disapeared. He fell to the ground with a 'clunk'. "You--info girl! Come here and I'll eat your knees!!"
"Now let's think rationally about this." Anakin cautioned.
TBC
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:53 PM
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>yes, I'm a professionalist at causing confusion recently<
"Oh my gosh! Anakin used a big word!" Tahiri exclaimed. The punks patted him on the shoulders affectionately, using their remaining limbs.
"Hey! I'm not disapearing!" Jacen said cheerfully.
"He's right!" Tenel added. The punks frowned in pained thought.
"Ow, my head! I've figured it out! We could just ask Glinda here to send us back!" Valin said.
"Glinda? But I said my name was--"
"I know! We could click our shoes together three times and repeat 'there's no place like home' several billion times." Jaina offered.
"That's a problem for those of us who are currently missing their feet." Anakin replied.
"Oh...." Jaina looked downcast.
TBC
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Jaken: Say You Love Me, People
Total Posts: 4226
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:55 PM
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>I'm just here for the show<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:58 PM
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In the 'normal' reality...
The punks looked with confusion out at Coruscant.
"Doesn't anyone remember what planet is made completely of skyscrapers?" Jacen cried.
"Nope." Jaina said sadly. Yoda hobbled up to the punks and tapped Anakin on the shoulder. He screamed and ran to hide behind his sister.
"Ew, what is it Jaina?"
"I think it's a vegetable gone wrong....though it could be a potted plant crossed with a Chandra-fan."
"Jedi Master Yoda am I." Yoda said, confused.
"Aargh! It can talk, too!" Jacen shouted.
"Drinking recently what have you been punks Jedi?"
"Huh?"
Yoda repeated himself.
TBC
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Jaken: Say You Love Me, People
Total Posts: 4226
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 3:59 PM
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>*Dies laughing and then is resurected so he can watch more*<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:02 PM
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"Oh." Jaina said, catching on. "Orange Glo have we drank recently. Little red pills we took soon after."
"Huh?" Yoda said, then sighed. "Designer drugs you all are on. Advil, it was. Amnesia, have you all."
"Speak basic do you?"
"Speaking basic am i."
"Oh. Understand basic normal do you?"
"Yes, understand do I."
"Good." Jaina frowned. "What exactly is Advil?"
"Gotten it from Oprah must you have."
"Who?"
"Mind never."
"I'm confused!" Anakin wailed. he paused. "Hey, it actually itsn't all that bad!"
TBC
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:07 PM
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>lol< in yet a third reality.... "So you've managed to get to Earth somehow?" Podracer finished. "Yes. And we remembered your help with the GDDD, and thought you might be able to, you know, write us home? Untwist the plot line a little?" Tenel Ka said hopefully. "Sorry, but no. This is too much fun!" JainaSolo * replies for Podracer, typing away madly on her laptop. She shreiks as Lowie attempts to strangle her. "Someone else can un-confuse my blotted mess of the plot!" she choked out. Lowie snarled menacingly. "No, really! Go beg beeurd!" A look of extreme terror crosses beeurd's face as Lowie bounds towards him. "Aarggh no! Don't you know that JainaSolo * is really beeurd spelled backwords?" the Psychos trade off on getting strangled until JainaSolo * signs her rank on the bottom of this post. ~_~_Sf1_~_~
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:08 PM
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>lol, sorry, I had to do it!I'd been thinking about this all science today instead of paying attention!!<
~_~_Sf 1_~_~
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:22 PM
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almost....500.....
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:23 PM
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>only...5 more posts....<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:23 PM
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>I<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:24 PM
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>I am<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:24 PM
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>I am bumping<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:24 PM
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>I am bumping this<
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JainaSolo;)*
Total Posts: 500
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Date Posted: Oct 25, 2002 4:25 PM
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>woooohooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!
500 posts!!!!!!!!
yeaaahhhhhhh!
I'll go celebrate by watching Buffy...<
~_~_Sf1_~_~
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princessjedi75
Total Posts: 983
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Date Posted: Oct 26, 2002 5:41 AM
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<i am posting>
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princessjedi75
Total Posts: 983
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Date Posted: Oct 26, 2002 5:53 AM
This message was edited by princessjedi75 on Oct 26, 2002 5:54 AM
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Meanwhile the Punks were still with Yoda........
"Hey umm Yoda?" Jaina asked. "Question have you. Yes," Yoda said. Anakin sighed. They would never get home after this one. "Uh do you know how to get to the future?" "Yes. Yes. Know how I do." Yoda said. Tahiri looked up. "Can you get us 30 years in to the future?" she asked. Yoda thought about it."Yes. Do will I. Condtion only under one will I." "What is that?" Zekk asked. "A strange group Trekkies they call them. Trying to kill us they. Teamed up with the gungans they have. Need your help do we." "We'll do it!" The Punks said in unison. Yoda smiled. Anakin felt a little uneasy about the gungan part though.
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Emperor Veydar Beeurd
Total Posts: 1118
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Date Posted: Oct 26, 2002 12:05 PM
This message was edited by Emperor Veydar Beeurd on Oct 26, 2002 12:06 PM
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>I hate to spoil everyone's fun... but I thought the Punks were back from the Matrix, as it was just an alcohol induced nightmare... If it is not like that, then Congratulations! You just confused me! (btw it was me that posted the Punks waking up etc.)<
-=-=-= Stead Two =-=-=-
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Jaken: Say You Love Me, People
Total Posts: 4226
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Date Posted: Oct 26, 2002 1:50 PM
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>*Gets some snacks from the lounge then comes back and waits for the next installment*<
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